looking for the off-ramp

as i have said many times before i love the beginning of the new year. below was my horoscope for this week from ROB BREZSNY'S FREE WILL ASTROLOGY

Aquarius Horoscope for week of December 25, 2008

Imagine you're driving down a very wide highway that's 50 lanes across even though there are no lines dividing one lane from another. Speed limit signs aren't posted, and some vehicles are zipping along in zigzag paths at over 100 mph while others crawl along like old-lady turtles. Now and then you've got to weave your way through a congested area where many on-ramps all feed into the road simultaneously. You haven't seen an off-ramp yet, and you're not sure where to get off anyway. I figure, Aquarius, that 2008 had some resemblance to the scenario I just described. Luckily, I predict that no later than your birthday, you will find an off-ramp and exit onto an uncluttered backroad with great scenery.

yep brezsny summed it up perfectly. 2008 has been a full year of me screaming "just get the fuck out of my way" maybe that's another reason why slow ass crazy drivers have been getting on my last nerve. i'm just looking for an off-ramp.

and i love brezsny's horoscopes. they are not your typical blah blah blah 1 liners.

well folks i for one am happy to say goodbye to 2008 now all that's left is some new year cleaning.

had enough of turkey

ooooowheeee people...if i am anything i am tired of turkey and i didn't even have that much. i am almost tired of dressing. god bless my mom, there are some things she just can't cook. but dressing isn't one of them. at least i don't think so. i love my mom's dressing. most of the time it's moist and she usually cooks it where the top is nice and crunchy. but 4 meals of it is border lining it.

biscuits, one of the main staples in a southerners diet falls short with my mom. flat and dry. but i think all biscuits are dry. however, my mom could cook great yeast rolls. hmmm maybe that's why i prefer rolls over biscuits. most of the time anyway. gravy doesn't go as well with rolls but that doesn't mean i don't try it every chance i can get. now gravy she could do. even when it didn't come from a mix.

pecan pie-nope my mom can't pull that one off either. but for decades we would and will continue to eat her pecan pie, even though you need a knife to saw the crust apart, for years to come. if she makes anymore that is. this thanksgiving she didn't. she made a punch bowl cake. it was tasty but she forgot to add several ingredients, oh yeah and the cake got a bit brown on the bottom and she didn't quite finish cutting off the brown parts. but i still had a great thanksgiving. overcooked food and all. isn't there a saying that says "dry food leads to great families"? no? well there should be.

which brings me to what i wanted to write about. how much i enjoy QVC. that channel cracks me up. i have never bought anything from QVC. i've been tempted. oh yes, i've been tempted. tonight the host was david venerable. at least i think that's his last name. david was selling food, which he does so well. for those of you not into QVC let me tell you about QVC host david. he is a southerner or so sounds like it and i think that he is gay (on the edge of queeny) and he is about 6'2. and that makes me like him even more. he also seems to get alot of the food showings and i think it's because he can chew visually very well.

anyway, some guy from harry london was there selling his chocolate. they are out of ohio for those of you interested. showing a 3 tiered box set of individually wrapped chocolates. yum. and the "today's top pick" so it was going for around 40 bucks. which apparently is a steal. and they were giving us the selling points of these chocolates. homemade, fresh ingredients, gourmet chocolate, and they are individually wrapped. the wrappers (most of them) tell you what type of candy they are. david, sharing a personal memory (as the host do) told about how when you buy the box candy you can't always tell what kind they are. so he would stick his fingers into the candy to find out. and david then said "well like my momma always said, if you stick your finger in it you gotta eat it". to me that was great. it's such a great quote.

if you didn't find it funny well then too bad.

out of the blue

this year has been hard financially for me. from the beginning of the year to now, i have been spending money on things that were needed around my house. gutters, water heater, a new shed, mower, car fixed. this weekend was the first time in a long time where i took a list to the grocery store and wrote down the price of the product so i could keep up with how much i was spending. my last post was about taking my car in to be fixed. granted poor viviene needed it so i’m not bitching about it. but i have started to feel the strain of not having money available. i live alone and i am the soul provider of my household. there isn't another person who can help pull the load. but i manage. all of my bills are paid. i don’t have creditors hounding me. even though i am living month to month and sometimes week to week i still feel fortunate to have a roof over my head and all my bills paid. i have never made it a habit to "really" complain about not having money. it's always a good day if you have a roof over your head and food on the table.

but lately a numb depression has been surrounding me. “how am i going to afford christmas?” it’s a month away and i am so cash poor that i can’t even use my credit card to ease the tension. but at the same time that the numbness was taking over, i also felt a calmness about it also. maybe the numb feeling was the calm. don’t know. that’s a new feeling for me. and then today in the mail a blessing happened.

i have never in my life received an anonymous gift in the mail. but today, at work no less, i received mail that was addressed to me care of my work. it was a typed letter with a MERRY CHRISTMAS sticker on the front and a NO PEEKING sticker on the back. i was thinking that one of the sites had mailed their invoices to me with the christmas stickers stuck on the outside. however, when i opened it up there was a white piece of paper with MERRY CHRISTMAS typed on it and cash. yes cash. a lot of cash. for me it was a lot of cash. i was in tears. someone thought enough about me to send me money. and i don’t even know who it is. i haven’t voiced my “really broke” issue with many people. well maybe i do have an idea who it might be but i am not sure. it so came out of the blue but i guess that’s what blessings are. that money will take care of 3 birthday’s and 5 christmas gifts.

now i have to think about should i call the person who i think it is? but if that person wanted me to know who it was they would have put their name on it. either way they have made my day. i have had that good gooing feeling since lunch.

and i also know that even though i am broke as shit, i have friends who love me and care about me. and i could never repay that. i can only pay that forward. so thank you whoever sent me the money and thank you goddess for helping chose good friends. i am blessed.

taking viviene to the doctor

i’m soooo glad the election is over and that my team won. so glad i am, that having to get my car fixed yesterday and just about breaking my bank, i didn’t get over anxious about it. for a while now, and by a while i mean years, my gear shifting has been a little to hard to...well shift. i have broken the gear twice already and had to drive with it zip-tied until i could fix it. but in the last week it got really bad. so bad that i was afraid that i was going to break the shifter thingy again. and i didn't want that to happen because brad said he wouldn't band-aid it again. it involves removing the console and getting down in the floor board to unscrew things. and of course i knew it was sick but i just keep putting it off. so on monday i took it to the mechanic 1 door down from my work. and let me just say how much that rocks to have a mechanic within walking distance from ones work.

anyhoo, i drove over there at lunch and explained my problem, and then left it there for the guy to look at and tell me what’s up. i also wanted him to check on this whine when my car started. the sound was loud and had been loud for....you guessed it....years. so i walked back to work and about 20 minutes later i get the call. the clutch master/slave cylinder needed to be replaced and the whine came from a bad serpentine belt, a idler pulley and the tensioner pulley. don’t i sound like i know what i’m talking about??? i must confess that i wrote that from looking at the bill. i have the general idea but i don’t know the name of things like that. i just takes up too much brain memory. so i went to pick up my car and he told me to bring it back on wednesday cause that’s when all the parts would be there. he also gave me an estimate on how much all of this would cost. i did have the money. barely. and might as well fixed all those problems now. but no worries. like i said, i knew i would be a feel good week.

so wednesday came, the shop called me to tell me that the parts were there, i drove it over and left viviene, that’s what i call my car, and headed back to work. still no worries. usually i would have been in a panic for the entire day over the money and the fact that i couldn’t just get in my car and go. granted i wasn’t planning on leaving spur of the moment from work but for me the access to my car gives me a certain amount of control. i called back around 3:30 cause i just couldn’t stand it anymore and pam the shop’s office manager said that’s it’s ready to go and the amount would be $464 dollars. so i rearranged my money on line and headed down there. but of course all of my rearranging of money didn’t go into effect yet so i had to pay by check and credit card and then come back to work and rearrange money for a second time. oh well. i am really really broke for about a month but now my gears shift like butter. i miss that. muscle memory came back into play and i realized why i enjoyed driving my car. and there is no more whine. my car is quiet. viviene likes being in stealth mode again.

all in all it wasn’t that much money considering that viviene is 12 years old and that’s the first time i have put that much money into her for things other than necessities.

and i found a mechanic that i like. he was nice and i think fair and he took the time to show me what he was going to do. he showed me the belt and then he showed me what he replaced. i appreciate that since i am a visual learner.

YES WE CAN

“If there is anyone out there who still doubts that America is a place where all things are possible; who still wonders if the dream of our founders is alive in our time; who still questions the power of our democracy, tonight is your answer.

Its the answer told by lines that stretched around schools and churches in numbers this nation has never seen; by people who waited three hours and four hours, many for the very first time in their lives, because they believed that this time must be different; that their voice could be that difference.

Its the answer spoken by young and old, rich and poor, Democrat and Republican, black, white, Latino, Asian, Native American, gay, straight, disabled and not disabled - Americans who sent a message to the world that we have never been a collection of Red States and Blue States: we are, and always will be, the United States of America.

Its the answer that led those who have been told for so long by so many to be cynical, and fearful, and doubtful of what we can achieve to put their hands on the arc of history and bend it once more toward the hope of a better day.
Its been a long time coming, but tonight, because of what we did on this day, in this election, at this defining moment, change has come to America.”

PRESIDENT-ELECT BARACK OBAMA

i voted for obama because he spoke to me. and by the looks of it he spoke to millions.

this man's a preacher to many.

we the people

in less than a month the nation will decide on it's new president. it's become a heated battle and sometimes it feels that it's a fight between good and evil. our country is spiraling out of control and we haven't even glimpsed the bottom. our money's no good, the economy is collapsing, we are in a war under false pretense's, we have lost trust in our political leaders and the rest of the world hates us. this administration is arrogant and bullyish. 8 years ago a lot of people saw this coming and we voted against, who i feel is, one of the most disillusioned men in america. however, we were outnumbered. 8 years ago i took one look at gw and saw disaster. he would be nothing but trouble and i was shocked that other people didn't see it. my gut told me then that he wasn't the right man for the job. then 4 years ago me and a lot of other people were out voted again. i was once again shocked that people couldn't see his real face. but as time goes on i can see that maybe, just maybe he has destroyed this nations trust in itself so badly that people will scream out for change.

once again this year i have decided to follow my gut one more time. i know that it may not be the best way to determine who i vote for but it's a feeling that i have come to believe in. i remember one time where i told someone that's how i vote and that person said "you can't vote based on that" well yeah i can. it's my right as an american to do so.

late last year i saw a commercial where obama was promoting the superbowl. and even though he was on the tv for a few seconds my gut told me that he was "the one" to be the next president. long before the primaries had even started. every time i see him i can't get that feeling out of my mind. for the first time i feel that someone speaks to me and for me. he has a believable quality. but do i feel he is completely trustworthy? uuhhh no. what i do feel is that he will lead the way for people other than upper class white men to become the leaders of our country. no chance for women. no chance for hispanics, no chance for asians, no chance for people with a different belief other than christianity will be able to lead us until the door has been opened. and i believe that obama is the key to opening that door. to break down the good ole boy network. will be be the best president? don't know. will he make choices for this country based on the voice of the rich? yeah probably. will he fixed our corrupt system? no. we are way beyond being fixed by one man and one administration. but he will set a precedence.

for 8 years i have been able to tell all those people, who now bitch and complain about the state of the nation, "you voted for him- TWICE" i would now like the opportunity to be responsible for electing someone who has the potential to be great. and in 4 years when things are still bad you can feel free to look at me and say "you voted for him" damn right i did.

close to home

the state is a buzz about the threats made by a mtsu student. and so they should. when i first heard about it yesterday i was proud of the fact that the school took the emails of “large-scale devastation” threats serious enough to cancel classes and secure the campus. as far as i could see, they had learned from the tragedy at virginia tech and shut it down. BUT THEN COMES THE BITCHING. it seems i have read the same article over and over again on different websites. but the comments have been caraaaaazy. in ‘the tennesean’ people are bringing race to their comments. some claim that this dumb ass boys threat were blown out of proportion. that the campus over-reacted. that of course the person who made these threats was black, because as we all know the prison’s are filled with black people and they are the only ones who commit crimes. are you freaking kidding me? the officials didn’t know who made the threats when they cancelled school. and it shouldn’t matter what color the boy was. what did matter was that his threats were serious enough to take action. some also say that the emails and notifications weren’t sent out fast enough or didn’t reach everyone. jesus h christ. when nobody dies. it’s a good day. the course taken wasn’t perfect but it worked-this time. and maybe after 1 scare under their belt it will work great the next time.
when i read the dnj, the comments were thankful that a potential crisis was averted. yeah because we live here. we go to mtsu or know someone who does and it would be a bad day indeed if the school had ignored the possiblity of threat. cause god knows that mtsu can be screwed up with a lot of things.

so the way i see it, we are dealing with boy who had a bad decision day and decided that if he sent some threatening emails he could get out of midterms. (yeah like that could happen, if not today then another. you don’t get out of mid-terms) or he wasn’t right in the head. either way he made a bad choice and should have to pay for that bad choice. or it could be a cry for help. whatever. but it could have been. if the boy had really wanted to hurt someone he wasn’t going to announce it. he would have just done it and we would be dealing with a huge loss. theatening people with death is just not the way to go. and he could be black, white, yellow, purple or chartreuse and i would still feel the same way. there needs to be huge consequences and he needs to pay for his actions. because we all know that there are going to be other crazy kids out there who think that by doing something similar that they will be able to get out of a problem.

cause some people are always trying to blame their problems on someone else. but that's a whole 'nother rant

apparently the "emerging trend of female pastors" is not something that the good ole boys of the southern baptist convention want to try on.

if you haven't heard already this magazine was pulled from shelves across the country in the LIFEWAY christian bookstores (which are ran by the southern baptist convention) because the mag featured female pastors. however, you can request the mag from the christian bookstore clerk and that clerk will pull it out from under the counter. just like any other dirty porn magazine that the public shouldn't see.

now here is the thing. lifeway is owned the the SBC. and if the SBC don't believe in something like women pastors they have the right to pull the magazine from their shelves.

i grew up southern baptist if you can't tell. i went to church every time the doors where open until i left for college when i was 20. so when i rant about the christian's i feel i can speak from experience. i've experience the hypocrisy within the church, i have also experienced the holy spirit at work in the church. so it's not the individuals that i have a problem with it's the dogma. preaching the word of god while at the same time not treating all souls as equal.
the sbc and all the other denominations who refuse and don't believe in women being pastor's or reverend's or holy guide's i feel hide their oppression behind their so called interpretation of their scripture. to them there is no way in heaven that a woman could even be close to being called to preach.

so are women not worthy enough to preach the word of god? do women lack the wisdom and knowledge to bring souls to christ? is the weight of eve to great to overcome? it would seem to me that eve may have offered the apple to adam, but adam wasn't strong enough to refuse it. so who is the weak one here? both are to blame in their fall from grace.

i believe that god doesn't care about whether a person is a woman or a man when it comes to showing the way to salvation. and i don't believe jesus cares either. both work in mysterious ways, and if it is god's will that a women should lead then it would seem that refusing a women to lead would go against his will.

of course i really don't have a dog in this fight. i am just writing my opinion. i figured out a long time ago that my god doesn't roll that way. all facets of god loves all faces.

well folks, it just another boring day at work. sometimes it gets so boring that i often contemplate getting a new job so i can be busy. i like to be busy at work. it makes the day go by faster and coming home that much sweeter. but on days like this i can't find enough to do. i do have filing to do but deep down in my heart i know that the task will only last a few minutes and not worth the trouble. i'm going to save it for a really busy day. i've even talked with other people today just to pass the time but most of them got lucky to sit through a boring presentation for a couple of hours. in the dark. in a very cool room. i don't think i could make it. i wouldn't be able to keep my eyes open.

so lets see what is going on in the real world.

mccain tagged sarah palin to be his vice president. whatever. i believe that the only reason he picked her was because hilary was getting a lot of the democratic votes and mccain and his minions thought it would be a great idea to jump on that band wagon. and the sad part is he might be right. i am sure that there are women out there who want a female president or in this matter as vice president so bad that they would vote for this aging prisoner of war just so the femi-nazis of this country can say that a women finally made it to the white house. and again whatever. i wont be voting for him just to see a tina fey look alike make it to the white house. i don't feel that she is qualified. she just has a vagina.

today is 9/11/08. a day to remember all the people who died because of some fundamentalist muslims who felt the need to prove a point and hijack airplanes and fly them into buildings.
and 7 years later where has it gotten us? think about it. just more deaths.
it's also my friend dollie's birthday. that's gotta suck. but happy birthday anyway. just be glad that your alive and well.

just a little something

check out where the hell is matt if you haven't seen it already.

the language of dance is universal.

customer service means servicing the customer

can you hear me now? good. can you hear me now? good.
yes i know that verizon can have some annoying commercials-my favorite being the 2 little ghosts boys in the hallway- but i am a big fan of verizon for so many reasons.

in my job of a/p gypsy and now a/r gypsy as a result of a mass lay off, i am in charge of dealing with all the cell phones for the company. luckily by the time i inherited the cell phone albatros we were down to 2 cell phone companies. verizon and sprint, which was nextel which was...oh who the hell knows. anyhoo, i have to occasionally call these companies for different issues. adding a phone, cancelling a phone, suspending a phone. with verizon i have a rep that can handle some of the questions like “i need a global blackberry and a global sim card by tomorrow” my rep says no problem.

if i have to call verizion, which is more than i call sprint “thank goddess”, after a few prompts i am answered quickly by a customer service person who is able to handle every issue i have. they are always nice and courteous and always act happy that i called. they act like your friend. go figure. a customer service person who actually wants to do their job and offer you service.

when i call sprint, after a few prompts, i always have to wait and wait and wait for a human to pick up the phone. all the while listening to ear piercing on hold music. and after the “i don’t want to be here” customer service person picks up they always talk way to fast and can’t ever seem to do the job that i need done. so back into call pergatory i go to wait and wait and wait for someone else to pick up to complete the issue. and they are just as unfriendly as the last person.

i am pulling this story from my experience today. i had to call sprint (which i had been dreading) to disconnect 3 numbers that would no longer be needed. so the first "i'm so happy to be here" guy picked up the call and of course couldn’t help me. even though i had all the pin#s correct and my blood sample matched. no #1 i'm so happy to be here boy couldn’t disconnect the phones so he sent me to #2 i'm so happy to be here girl. #2 girl really just didn’t want to be there. she acted like she would rather be sand papering her eyeballs than answer the freaking phone.
after saying no a thousand times to “would you like to consider only suspended this phone or instead changing this phone over to a broadband card” or whatever people call those things that hook into a laptop so it can get internet. i said “NO NO NO i don’t want to prolong the service in any kind of way on those #’s...please. i also wanted them disconnected on friday.”
#2 girl, “i can’t do that, your cycle ending 2 days ago and it wont be prorated”
“i don’t care. they need to not have service after friday”
“well i will be able to stop all incoming and outgoing calls, is that what you want?” #2 girl said with disdain
“no i just wanted to call you and be on hold for 10 minutes and have you talk to me like i was the hired help” no not really. i really said “yes that’s what i would like to happen but not until friday night”.
“ok i have that set to stop all incoming call and outgoing calls as of tonight” dumbass chirped
“NNNOOOOO, it needs to happen on friday night” sweet little me
so after i finally felt that me and “happy to be here in hell” girl were on the same page she of course has to do the ending dialogue of her speech.
“have i answered all you questions and met what you needed?”
“yes” i said in my nicest voice
and then the best question of all that i love to answer. it’s that last question, that if you have in someway not catered to me being that your job is customer service, that i will be truthful about.
“and one last question-on a scale of 1 to 10 please rate your experience with us today”
she was shocked when i said “6 and most of that is for being on hold for too long” cause i thought 6 was being generous but i refrained from being completely blunt. i need those numbers to stay connected until friday.

cable internet part deux

well i've been having connection problem since i switched over to internet cable. my computer was dropping the signal and the address's (or what ever you call them) were disappearing. so thursday night i called comcast again. got another woman. which rocks and from her side she was thinking that it was the connection and not the modem. if it was the modem that would suck considering that i bought my modem and am in the process of getting the money back from the rebate. anyhoo, after setting me up with someone coming to my house on saturday, which is today, we hung up. and as soon as i hung up the connection came back. the woman called me back and said "hey, it's connecting again", "i know" i said, "well i think it's the connection" she said, "let's hope", i said. and ended the call.

on friday i came home from work and sat down to see what might be up with the connection. nope not there. however, i had the insight early on to write down all the numbers to all the lines (ips, subnet, dns server blah blah blah) when it was working properly and entered them manually. and i was up and going

now for anyone out there who has ever dwelt with comcast you really never know if they will show up on time or what kind of person you will get. will they be nice or just pissed off to be there, so i decided to let go of the stress and let what happens happen. i was scheduled to have someone out between 10 and 12. but at 9.45 dwayne called up and said he was on his way. he showed up at 10 and checked the connection at the poll. dwayne said that the connection was loose at the poll and that could have been some of the problem. then when he looked in the house he said right away that another reason for broken connection could be that i had been using the wrong size cable. apparently cable users should be using RG 6 cable and i was using RG 9. i also asked if that was going to effect some of my digital channels especially the national geographic channel. "sure". so i turned on the tv and luckily the channel was acting up. cause you know the problem NEVER happens when the technician is around. but it was. so he went to his truck and got out the right sized cable, hooked it up and boom the channel came on. yeah yeah yeah.
i went out after he left and bought the right cable. i haven't changed it over yet because it would mean a lot of moving shit. but my internet is working right now. lets see if after i change all the cables over if i have anymore problems.

but in the long run, dwayne was courteous, explained what i needed to fix the problem and gets kudo's for being a nice guy. at my job i'm not always the nicest person to deal with. i have a job to do and i don't tolerate stupid gracefully. however, if you are nice to me i'm nice to you and i always, ALWAYS try to get along with the IT people. i find that if you are nice to the people who keep your system running then they will keep you that way. the same attitude applies to the people who come to my house to repair or install something. they are there to do a job and if you treat them with respect more than likely you'll get it back.

it was easy as 1,2...

by 6:30 last night i was up and running with my new HIGH SPEED internet. and it was easy to a point and that point was running the comcast install wizard. which is really the very first step after connecting all the cables.
everything was good but the connectivity, but my modem showed activity and my computer showed connection with the ethernet, so why wasn't it working? ah shit. i was going to have to call comcast. i was hoping to avoid that. so i called. problem with the system "our representatives are busy at the moment and will take your call in the order it arrived" blah blah. it was only a few minutes, the first time anyway. so some dude named james answered. i explained what the deal was and was on the phone for less that 5 minutes and i had already found out that he was from cincinnati and he was living in nashville and was trying hard to become a country music writer and at the moment beside working at comcast he was working as a staff writer on music row. in less than five minutes. but that happens all the time. i learn way to much about people i've never met. anyhoo, the bastard put me on hold an never came back. well i could have let myself get very pissed off about this but i chose to remain semi calm and call again. this time i got a girl, thank goddess because the guy sure as hell didn't help me. so i explained to "nesha" what the deal was and we come to find out that the reason that the wizard wont work is because i'm not set up in their system as having internet. since i had ordered my modem and kit from a comcast offers website the actually comcast had no idea, so that's why the wizard wouldn't work. but nesha rocked, she got me set up and i was able to get the same username that i had with bellsouth. and that made me excited. it's a simple name and i've had it for around 15 years and no one had chosen it yet from comcast. yeah me.
nesha even helped me set up my email account. and have i mentioned yet that brad really didn't do much of anything? nope not really much other than giving me moral support.
so it's all good now.

fly like an eagle

oh people-todays the day
last week i sent for my self install kit from comcast for HIGH SPEED internet. i have decided to pay the extra money for HIGH SPEED internet and get rid of my land line. and today it has arrived.

i have been on dial up for about forever now and even though i am semi-ok with the slloooowwwwneessss of it i was still not ready to make the jump because of the price. however, it seems now that the only people calling me are telemarketers ( and yes i did sign up to be on the no call list but the roaches still seem to get through) and if i got rid of my phone and the internet through them i will be saving money.
it was getting rid of the land line that has been the biggest obstacle on my road to HIGH SPEED browsing. for some reason i connected the land line to being grounded. it’s the way it has always been. for me and people my age we didn’t have computers when i was in high school much less the ability to fly like an eagle around the world and back from the comfort of my living room. and everyone had a land line. i’m ok with change after the fact it’s the decision to change from what i have always known that makes me stop. it’s in our genetic makeup to fear change it’s also in our genetic makeup to explore. yes i know that i am comparing getting HIGH SPEED internet to exploring but that’s the way i process so back off. this morning i was all set to bitch about the disabled peoples boycott of “tropic thunder” which i think i crazy. if you want to be treated as an equal to the NON-special people you need to get used to people making fun of you. this little rant is much more positive.
so today when i go home brad is going to help me set this hi-tech stuff up. the problem may be is that i have a MAC and that is something my brainiac boyfriend is not familiar with. but as he has said many times in the end it’s all the same. so we shall see.

brad is also the one who found the site that would allow me to get internet for 19.99a month for 6 months and also a (free) modem. and if i’m not on crack i think they will also give me $100. the (free) modem and $100 are after rebate of course. but i’m good with rebates. so far that is.

there is a scene from “the chronicles of riddick” that has been running through my mind lately. the scene takes place after riddick has been caught and is taken to the planet Crematoria. for those of you who haven’t seen the movie. crematoria is a dead world were the day time surface temperatures (like a 1000 degrees) scorch the face of the planet, while the night time temps are survivable. it’s also a prison miles underneath the surface. anyway, when the sun isn’t blaring and darkness is over the land, it’s possible to exist on the surface but when the sun comes it destroy anything living with it’s blast furnace heat. this is how it’s been feeling lately here in the ‘boro. night time is bearable but the the daytime is freaking hot. not to mention that the humidity is around 70%. so everyday when i walk out side and i immediately feel sticky and hot that scene runs through my mind. it doesn’t help that i’ve seen this movie more than several times and that’s the only scene that i remember vividly.

it’s also the dog days of summer. it’s a time from around the middle of july to the middle of august. wikipedia calls it a phenomenon. don’t know why it’s a phenomenon. but it’s considered a “time period or event that is very hot or stagnant, or marked by a dull lack of progress”. also ‘popularly believed to be an evil time “when the seas boiled, wine turned sour, dogs grew mad, and all creatures became languid, causing to man burning fevers, hysterics, and phrensies” -brady’s clavis calendarium”. yep that about covers it.

however, my banana plants are digging it. especially since i put them in pots this year instead of planting them. i find i am more likely to water a plant in a pot then in the ground.
here are some pics. the bigger tree is suppose to bear fruit in it's 3rd year which is next year.


the leaves are huge. you can see my arm holding up the leaf. they are about a yard long

and here are the babies.

if you don't have anything to say

then don't say anything.

yeah that sounds like me. i'm known for keeping my mouth shut.

ya'll i am tired of hearing brett favre’s name. what i do find weird is that when i do hear his name it’s on the radio and t.v. but i never see any articles about him. from what i understand he went into retirement from the packers but decided he wanted to play again but got pissed off when the packers wouldn’t let him start. he sounds like a big ol’ baby, that’s what i think.

big brother started again. last time it sucked. they had big brother “soul mate” or something like that. each person in the house had another person in the house that was suppose to be their soul mate. oh please. so i didn’t watch much of it. i do believe that big brother would be the reality show that i could handle being on, if it wasn’t for the slop. i’m not into eating anything that looks like oatmeal and god knows what it taste like. i’m a picky eater.

also some of my other favorite reality shows have started again. “sheer genius” & “project runway”. yeah. i love my t.v. and it’s too hot to go outside.

last night was the sneak preview of "dinner impossible" with michael symon. the food network hired michael to do the show after robert irvine fattened up his resume with some bullshit info. anyway...for desert he decided to fry up some bacon and cover them in chocolate and then add almonds on top.
OH
MY
GOD
as some of you may know i am a bacon addict, and i had to remove myself from looking at the t.v. because it was just toooooo much for me. bacon and chocolate? my 2 favorite things. it was all i could do not to run into the kitchen at 10pm and pull out the bacon and melt some chocolate and have at. but i used my willpower to just walk away. it didn't help that a little later brad came into the bed room to tell me that one of the women who tried the desert said from me to eat my heart out.

i need to give a congrats shout out to BF brad. he is now on the grid.

happy birthday America

what a long weekend. me, brad and the kid-lettes spent the 4th with the boyd-reeds, doing what all good americans do to celebrate our countries freedom. eating and fireworks. i don't quite know how having friends over for a cook-out represents our country's birthday, but i would like to think it has something to do with our right to assemble, and our right to blow our hands off with explosives. or in one of my friends cases, burn your finger with a sparkler. those sparklers can be dangerous people.

anyhoo, after stuffing ourselves for several hours some of us headed over to campus to watch the fireworks accompanied by mtsu's orchestra. i LOVE to watch fireworks. personally i find it an art. the ability to mix and match elements in a small container and then upon explosion create beautiful figures of sparkly bits and colors.

we got to campus a little early. found our spots on the grass amid the other hundreds of people who came to see and experience the same occasion. it's these moments that i feel connected to everyone. a collective mass of other beating hearts who may not share the same beliefs but do share the common bond of being in and being a AMERICAN.

the long awaited drumbeat

meet the new addition to my drum family



this is a native frame drum. my friend stan "the drum man" finally finished it. stan is great. he has been traveling the country for over a decade teaching people and helping people make their own drum at his drum workshops. they usually last 2 days. you can decorate your drum shells, and that's the easy part. it's the stringing the can shread the skin off your hands.
if any of you are interested in having a workshop check out the website. buildadrum.com or you could email stan at stan@buildadrum.com

ashiko's, djembe's, djundjun's these are all african drums. but for the longest time i have been wanting a tribal drum or the native frame drum. and now i have it.
the skin is elk, the frame is cedar. the back handle (if you can see it) is deer antler. i'm thrilled and i am still waiting for the skin to dry so i can hear her tone.

i do confess that i don't play as much as i use to. i guess when the opportunities reduce the playing does to. i'm not one to play at home by myself.

the itsy bitsy spider

the itsy bitsy spider just fucking bit me. and wasn’t so itsty bitsy at all. it was as big as the palm of my hand...well a good couple of inches. on saturday evening i went outside to push mow my side yard since all the scrap metal from the shed is gone, gone, gone. and i though hey at the same time i will move the concrete diverter? that diverts the water from the downspout a different way. so there i was, rocking it back and forth when all of a sudden a sharp hot piercing pain came from my top knuckle on my thumb. i think the little fucker even stayed attached cause when i shook my hand something slung off it.
at this point many things went through my mind. i was pissed, scared that i would have to go to the hospital (which i don’t want to do at all) and how this all fits into my way of thinking with animal totems. but mainly i was pissed. how dare this spider bite me.
i ran inside and soaked my thumb in alcohol, which took away the initial burn. then i started freaking out. my body had just been bitten and adrenaline had just been dumped into said body. was i having a reaction to the bite? or just over-saturated with adrenaline? the thumb started to swell and i knew i needed to go onto the internet to see what i could see. all in all i treated it like an insect bite and put ice on it.
and then i called brad. i needed someone to talk me down from my freaking out high. and it worked.
i was still pissed. i wanted to start mowing and i wasn’t about to let the little fucker defeat me. so i went out and mowed. all the while thinking what the hell was that all about? when i have encounters with creatures i believe that spirit is trying to tell me something but even now i haven’t figured it out. the next day my thumb was stiff and sore and a little red but today it just feels like i bruised it.
if you haven’t figured it out by now i have never been bit by a spider, or where i recognized it as a full out assault from the 8 legged creature. and i find it very confusing. bee stings? no problem. wasp? no problem. sweat bees? no problem but a spider? iiiii don’t get it. i feel personally attacked.

but i’ll live. and sometime in the future i will see what spirit is trying to tell me other than wear gloves. but you see i do wear gloves...usually.
and i will still remove the little fuckers from my house instead of killing them.

project "new shed" FINISHED

yeah the new shed has been finished for quite some time. but many things have been going on and postings of pictures of days past were more important to me than showing the completed shed with ramp. but i have just moved the slideshow to the main page and on we go.
look at the inside. i can fit things in it. like mowers and ladders and...stuff. i can fit stuff in that shed and i don't have to worry about the shed falling down.





now the ramp was a different creature all together. my man the engineer was in charge of the ramp. i say that like he wasn't in charge of everything else but that is neither here nor there. it took mr. man a while to get the right angles on the ramp. my yard slopes every so slightly and the ramp was...well something to think about. but it's done.



yes the hole in the middle of the ramp was thought out. yes there is a hole because we ran out of wood but i like it. it's very i ching. i will like it until i fall through it and out it will go. i am trying to figure out what i can put on the ground that you would be able to see. colors stones, glass a cool plaque?

and finally landscaping.

all my rowdy friends are coming over tonight

as promised. then and now pictures. i do have to apoligize to shannon and wendy. i couldn't find any up close picture's of you back then. so i just included the now. but wendy i do have a good one of you at halloween. i would have liked to organize them but i can only do so much on the blog. but do check out the slide show. i do have a disclaimer. not all of the now pictures came from me but from dollie and shannon who own a digital camera. i hope you guys don't mind.

reunion

que the 80's music-

time goes on but somethings remain the same

it was mtsu’s theatre alumni reunion weekend and of course i didn’t go to any of the functions. the reasons can be listed on a regular sheet of lined paper but the readers digest version is “been there, done that”.
but the reunion brought back to the boro several people who i haven’t seen in a long time. mike and dollie hosted a small gathering on friday night. those in attendance were, mike & dollie of course, me, craig (el badger), jenny from new zealand, shannon from miami, wendy from springfield (tn), lee from west (by god) virginia and derek from the lovely city of la vergne. if i have forgotten someone i am terribly sorry, i wasn’t drunk but my memory sometimes is.
anyhoo, friday night was great. i don’t know if it’s me or not but i have found many times that when i am around friends from college i feel relaxed. there is no having to explain who you are. no hoping to god that they get your sense of humor, or in my case not to piss someone off because a tactless comment has come out of my mouth. i had several circles of friends in college. friday night was a cross section of them. and if i remember correctly these people love a good argument, they are very bright and charismatic and it’s hard to get a word in edgewise. so if you got something to say you need to bring your stage voice. and if you don’t have anything to say then why the fuck are you there?
we all looked great. none of us look a day over 25. i am convinced that our perception of age is skewed when it comes to people we knew and loved in our 20’s. of course there a few more wrinkles and a lot more life experiences but the energy is the same.
we rehashed old memories danced to 80’s songs and showed pictures of our lives now. i found old pictures from the college days and brought them over so everyone could remember how much we partied and drank ourselves silly. a lot of “oh my god, i remember that party” or “hey that’s so and so with hair”. and pics of people who are no longer with us on this earth.

saturday night was another round of drinking and hanging out. an ex-professor showed up and for the out of towners it was a good time to get caught up with her.
hopefully then and now pictures will be coming later.

project "new shed"...almost there

well the deck was easier to put up than the shed. it also took longer to put up the shed. however, it wasn't difficult.

so 2 weekends ago the whole crew came and put up the thousand piece shed. not really but at times it felt like that.
so what you see above is the bottom track and the corners going in first. the kids helped. every exterior screw or bolt had to have a plastic washer on it so they prepared the screws for us. they would also hold up the metal if we needed it. and after a couple of hours of that it was all down hill for them. craziness insued. but i felt that they could have been alot worse so it was all good.



here is eli coming out of the finished bottom half. and then a pic of the thingy's that go across the shed to help hold up the roof. eli is a good helper. they all are but eli does what you ask and doesn't ask alot of questions. unlike ethan who can always find a fault or give a suggestion on how you need to do something. just like his father.

anyhoo, at this point it was hot outside. brad has already sliced his finger and bled on the metal and the deck. at least it was a clean cut, that metal is SHARP. but that helped me out. him slicing his finger and all. i was wondering how i was going to bless the shed and brad did it for me. to me it's good luck to bled on your work. i'm a seamstress for the theater by hobby and it is good luck to prick your finger while sewing and then spread your blood on a seam, if your lucky to get to a seam. so when he bled on the shed it was good luck. i don't think brad shared the same thought. but that's what he gets. i had started out as the one screwing the shed together but i was going to slow and methodical so he took over. men. they have to rush through everything. well rushing will get you sliced.

finally got the roof on that evening just as the sun was going down. all the screws weren't in but it was good enough. the next day, i think. i made brad finish the roof. and secure down the shed to the deck. he was quite nasty about it. he wasn't in the mood to finish his work and he didn't like me asking questions. but i knew heavy winds were coming and he needed to finish the job. so whatever.




it n' it cute? i like it. from the front of the house it has opened up the back yard. BUT it's still not done. there is one last thing to be done. the ramp hasn't made it. i need the ramp. that was one of the reason's i got a shed was to house my new mower. and to do that i need a ramp. it's taking some time and with it raining every day. that and the fact that i have a slightly sloping yard. so hopefully my big new shed project will be done soon...hopefully.

toodles

blessed beltane to all

In your neat garden iris grows
Bright yellow, mauve - in stately rows.
This one you’ve picked’s a lovely thing,
I know it brightens up our spring.
But in the forest, springtime’s child,
A purple iris growing wild,
Can melt my heart as spring melts snow,
It’s spoilt me for the sort you grow!
- Jude, Wild Iris

happy beltane or may day everyone. may day is all about fertility, sensuality, and delight and flowering of life. a beginning of growth.

a mayday or beltane tradition is to fill a basket of flowers and give to someone in need of caring or healing. here is my gift to you.

project new shed day 4ish

wow, the dek block system rocks. put the block down on a semi level surface and then cut a 4 x 4 block to level out the joist. i kept wanting to square things up and make things perfect. brad was constantly saying "you don't need to, it will take care of itself." but seriously, if you have lot's of rocks in your yard. or you don't want to dig and don't care about seeing a couple of blocks underneath your deck. (i'm sure you can hide them somehow). then dek blocks are for you.

i'm sounding like a commercial. so far it's been a couple of hours each night and brad doing all the work and last night the deck boards started to go on. (yes all by themselves)

on these pictures you can see the 4 x 4 post cut to size to level out the joist. they are toe nailed (screwed ) in. then it's easy peasy from there. (like i would know). so far brad hasn't really let me doing much of anything. i don't exactly know why, but i think it may have something to do with him thinking it would slow him down. and he is right, i would be slow but it's not like i've never used tools before. when i was in the theatre i built a lot of things and used a lot of tools. big tools. tools that i wouldn't touch today. but where was i? oh yeah. the top deck boards have started going in. soon i'll be ready to set up my new metal 8 x 10 shed. that came in a 3 x 6 box. doesn't seem quite right, sizing wise that it. but...when it comes to assembly i don't question, i just pull out everything, make sure all the pieces are there and i read the instructions.

until next time.

project new shed...day uhh 3ish?

things have been happening a little at a time on the new shed. we stopped work last thursday. we took the weekend off. well brad took the weekend off. he had the kids and was working on his plot of land. so on saturday i dismantled the old shed 1 screw at a time. no using the sledge hammer. i patiently unscrewed each corroded, molded, painted over screw on the old rusty shed. now the pieces are stacked up in a pile waiting for haul off.

monday we set the corner blocks for the deck. pictures will come later. yesterday we laid all the other blocks and the floor joist. oh wait. we laid all the blocks but 1. that will happen tonight. so maybe by tomorrow we will be ready to put the floor boards on.

oh concrete ye will nary get the best o' me

this specific concrete that is. ok-so last night was the night to see if we (brad) could break up the concrete enough so we (brad) wouldn't need the jack hammer i was going to rent. i had an idea of what to do with some of the concrete chunks. i am recycling them to make a flower bed wall. they have a rustic flare and lots of edges. and frankly i don't give a shit. what else was i going to do with the concrete pieces? i have sink holes but i really didn't want to fill them in with concrete and my other option was to throw them out into the woods.


i get home, change clothes and head out to start putting the big concrete chunks into my new red wheelbarrow. that i of course cover with thick plastic so the concrete wouldn't scar my new red wheelbarrow. anyway, i soon find out that there is of course a wire mess sheet underneath the concrete. after a lot of hitting and smashing from brad we realize that what we really need to do is remove the wire mesh and then just maneuver the concrete pieces around so we can set the dek block underneath all the rubble. cause that's what it's going to be. rubble. i mean look at it, thousands of rocks. we both vote to hide it.


a little into the job brad has to leave, before he goes i try out the sledge hammer. not to bad. kind of fun. got safety glasses. (i did have brad take a picture but it was staged and didn't turn out good) while he is gone my goal is to pull up the wire mess embedded in the concrete. which i did. i am proud to say. i was exhausted and i could barely lift the sledge hammer but i did it.

the wire is NO longer embedded into the concrete. there is still concrete attached to the wire, but as brad says "no problem, take a sledge hammer to it". which i plan on doing tonight.

to recap-in the beginning my intentions were to remove all concrete from the area so the dek block could set on the earth. now after the destruction and the realization that there is way to much rubble the the rubble will be moved around to accommodate the block. brad and i are too lazy to really clean it all out. and since a deck will be going above it it sounds like the perfect solution.

i need to add that after a good 30 or 40 minutes welding a sledge hammer, not constantly of course, that i only feel pain in the sides of my lower back. and even that isn't to bad. i have a splinter that is causing me more pain.